The reason for this exercise wasn't just for fun. I have a real need to improve http://www.etsy.com/shop/ThatPoeGirl so I can actually sell my products. I know my photography is good and that my jewelry is pretty. So what am I doing wrong? My writing style, that's what. I tend toward just basic descriptions because when I go crazy and decide to be all creative, I instead end up with some horrifying cliches.
Reading through my product descriptions, I found an example of a basic description AND horrifying cliche all in one: "Lampwork blue flower glass beads with additional blue beads set on sterling silver hooks. Large enough to get noticed while staying elegant and fashionable!"
For this:
So here is my metaphor exercise: a beautiful pair of earrings that are described in such a way that someone wants to purchase them.
The earrings are:
Persian blue lanterns with wisps of cloudy sky.
Chris says it's a fish bowl with a Pepsi can in it.
Crystalline hot-air balloon with sterling silver rigging. (okay, I kinda liked that one!)
Of course, I keep coming back to a cloud city, but I can't figure out how to describe the blue beads below them...
A spool of crystal thread inlaid with delicate floral pinwheels.
Okay, which of you readers want a job writing this stuff for me? lol My real opinion of these is simply ooh, shiny. ;)
An oceanic world with floral clouds.
Let me know which of these you liked or if you have something to add...this exercise actually took me about 3 days, though admittedly with much distraction. I will probably re-visit this exercise later if I find a metaphor to be appropriate. However, I think I'm going to move on with other subjects and posts now so I don't give up on this blog just from the frustration.
